71 // How much candy can my child have before, during, and after Halloween?
How much candy can my child have before, during, and after Halloween?
Your blueprint to managing candy as a mom in the 72 hours before and after Halloween
On today's episode, I had a mom submit a question asking how much candy can her kids have not just on the day of Halloween, but also in the days before and the days following?
On Monday's episode, I addressed the first part of her question with the HOW we approach this. In this episode, we will get into spelling out the structure you may want to schedule into the days surrounding Halloween. With a clear approach to discerning how much candy to allow, you will walk away confident (instead of annoyed) the next time your child asks, "Mom, can I have candy?!"
Listen to this episode of The Veggies & Virtue Podcast now!
Full Episode Transcription
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[00:00:00] On today's episode, I had a mom submit a question asking how much candy can her kids have the day of Halloween, and how much can they have in the days following Halloween? And kind of what is that approach to allowing it the day of, and yet also tapering off the excessive amount of candy in the days following.
[00:00:18] So make sure you listen to Monday's episode where I address the first part of her question, and then today we will get into kind of what is your plan of attack for the upcoming week, the day of Halloween, and the days thereafter.
[00:00:34] Hey mama. I'm Ashley and welcome to the Veggies and Virtue Podcast. In this podcast, you will find simple menu ideas, kitchen organizational systems spelled out for mom life, and feeding tips and tricks that are both evidence based and grace. I believe that you can find flexibility when it comes to feeding your family so that you can feel calm, capable, and connected in the kitchen.
[00:00:53] As a registered dietician and Christian mom of three myself, I want you to break free from the mealtime battles and to feel equipped while feeding your kids all day long. Pull up a stool at my kitchen counter and let me pour you a cup of coffee and say a quick prayer for you. It's time to chat about the meal times, messes moments, and ministry of motherhood.
[00:01:14] Hi Ashley. My name is Heather and I have three. Two boys and a girl, eight, six, and three, and they love candy. At Halloween, all of the holidays, one thing that I really battle is how much candy to let them have on the day of the holiday. Like Halloween, and then how many, like, how much candy to have in the days following.
[00:01:41] I was wondering if you could give me some guidance on like how much to let them have on Halloween and then how to taper it off after the holiday. I get annoyed because they want the candy all the time, and I want them to enjoy it, but I want to approach it in a, in a gracious and a loving. Thank you for all that you do.
[00:02:05] I really enjoy your podcast and I'm looking forward to hearing from you. Thank you. First of all, Heather, thank you again so much for sending in this Speak Pipe. Again, make sure you listen to Monday's episode for the first part of how I handle this question, but I wanna make sure each of you know that whether it be Halloween related or now that we're getting closer to Halloween, really any content about the upcoming holidays or you know how to handle Thanksgiving dinner with particular family members.
[00:02:32] Any questions you have to help support you in feeding your family better, please make sure to go to veggies and virtue.com/ask. That's just a s k, and you can leave me a voice memo there and I would love to feature it on the show and not only get your question answered, but share it with a lot of other moms who I know likely have very similar questions to you.
[00:02:53] So Heather, thanks so much for taking the time to submit your questions so that we could talk about it on the show. This. , if you have questions about the feeding approach specifically that I encourage families to use in general, but especially at times like Halloween. Make sure you listen to Monday's episode where I dove into the overall feeding approach, and how do you utilize a division of responsibility in feeding at Halloween and how that compares.
[00:03:16] What are the pros and the cons compared to some other feeding approaches that we might be familiar? So what is my recommendation of what you should do? We're looking at Halloween and I'm airing this episode in advance because my hope is is that this can be kind of turning in your mind and you can begin brainstorming this in the days up to the day of and the days following.
[00:03:37] So we're talking about over the week before, during and after Halloween. I want you to think about it a little bit like. In this, and this is a rough estimate. It doesn't have to be specifically 72 hours before, but I'm just saying if we're looking at a seven day span before and after, did you guys ever find those Wonder Weeks guides when your kids were infants?
[00:03:56] I know that I would follow it because it would kind of tell you when maybe a potential troublesome spot would hit and it kind of would gray out. The window and it doesn't show precisely for your specific kid exactly when those challenges are going to fall and when you can expect some of these leaps to happen.
[00:04:12] There's certain times that we look at the calendar and we just know candy is going to be more of a challenge for our kid during this. Leap, but I kind of think about it like that when we look at Halloween and we kind of gray out the week or two around Halloween and how we want to intentionally be approaching this.
[00:04:28] Because again, if you are not intentional about this and you're just haphazardly going into Halloween and you don't have your response and your approach down, you are going to lack the confidence and the clarity in your. And most often that's going to result in a conflict with your kid on if and how much they can have when it comes to candy.
[00:04:46] So what do we wanna do when we look at the 72 hours before Halloween as the adult, We're not engaging our child at this point. This is us as the adult we are starting to tune into. The different requests they have, the different level of interests our kids may have. With sugar. You probably know those of your children, especially like in this mom's case, having three kids, similar ages of my own.
[00:05:08] I know the child who has an increased interest in sugar versus the one who rarely ever finishes something sweet. That they've been offered. So you wanna tune into the energy and the interest in the offerings that are being made around Halloween with those kids. Another thing I want you to do is to begin identifying some of those other sources of added sugar in the diet.
[00:05:30] And the reason I want you to do this is twofold. One, because when we're looking at candy intake out and around Halloween, usually for most kids, it's increased from what would maybe be their day to day or week to week norm. And so we want to be looking at, you know, trying to limit added sugar as much as possible while still permitting an amount of sugar that satisfies their cravings.
[00:05:51] And. A healthy relationship with food. However, so often we forget about the other 364 days of the year. We fixate so much on Halloween and the amount of candy that our kids might be having on the day of that we aren't tuning into all the sources of added sugar that are regularly being offered. And so I think it's important from a nutritional perspective because you can just begin observing what foods.
[00:06:14] You tend to offer your children and how much added sugars are in those foods. You can flip over the side of of the box. You can look at the nutrition fax label, see under total sugars where it says added sugar. And that's going to be showing you how much added sugar that isn't naturally occurring has been added into that food.
[00:06:31] And again, this is just to provoke some awareness on your end. You want to be thinking about how you are helping to. Provide nourishing ingredients for them throughout the day of Halloween in addition to the added sugar that you know that they're going to be having. So that's the first part, just from a nutritional awareness perspective, start tuning into which sources of added sugar are in the diet so you can be offering less of those during a time where you know they're having more overt added sugar in the form of candy.
[00:07:01] The second part of this is because it helps us as. Neutralized candy so often candy is the Achilles heel for parents. We just automatically had this evil perception of it, and we vilified the food in and of itself. However, as you begin to look into how much added sugar is in the foods that your child regularly eats, what you will likely see and begin to compare.
[00:07:26] is how much sugar those foods have to the candy because some of these little fun size, snack size candies, while as parents, we assume them to be completely nutritional, nutritionally void, their reality is, is their sugar content is often. Very similar to the things we're already offering, to the breakfast cereals, to the pop tarts, to the cinnamon toast, to the, you know, lunch items that we include from cookies to fruit snacks to granola bars.
[00:07:56] To the afternoon snacks or you know, dessert items that we often have. And so when we look at a child's interest in candy and we compare it to their apathy towards some of these other things that they could really give or take, and they don't care, we begin to neutralize our perception and our approach to these foods because we begin realizing this jam I'm putting on their peanut butter and jelly, or the nettella spread that we spread on their sandwich every single.
[00:08:23] Look how much sugar it has in comparison to the candy that they really want. And again, this isn't to additionally vilify any additional food. Instead, what's it's intended to do is it helps make you more aware of how you can neutralize all foods to see how all foods can fit. And in doing so, you begin to see how you can balance out the different nutrition that you're offering your child, because some things don't matter as much to your kid.
[00:08:49] And so whether you. This pack of fruit snacks or not. It might be out of habit that you do so, or that they reach for that, but they maybe don't yearn for that the same way that they're asking you for Halloween candy. So I want you to begin doing that. You can start today, start a couple days before Halloween, but begin kind of tuning into that amount of added sugar in the foods that they're already eating, and begin to see how it can often cross compare to the candy that they're wanting to be.
[00:09:18] As we move closer to Halloween itself in the day of, I want you to again, use this information and this knowledge that you've thought about and think about how you can provide foods for fuel specific to Halloween. I would be encouraging you to offer predominantly lu it foods. There's obviously a lot of competing interests on Halloween, so you wanna be thinking about that love it list that I walk you through in depth within meal times made easy method.
[00:09:46] so that you're offering a variety of. From different food groups on that love it list. And so as you hear in the interview with my daughter, she says, For dinner, let's do tacos, because that's one of her favorite foods. She can easily sit down and eat seven tacos. And what is that gonna do before she goes trick or treating?
[00:10:03] It's gonna help fuel her so that she's not. Inclined by true hunger to need or want quite as much sugar. Do I know that she's still going to want a lot of sugar or a lot of candy that night? Yes, she will. But compare that to a dinner like when I make stir fry chicken, one of her least favorite options and a a meal that has much fewer love it foods for her and she's just going to eat less.
[00:10:27] So on the day of Halloween, what I want you to be thinking about is for breakfast, how can you maybe pick something that your child eats and enjoy? But might be lower in that added sugar. So say they like cheesy eggs and avocado, but they also love pancakes and syrup. Well, on Halloween, I would probably be choosing something with less added sugar, being like the cheesy eggs and avocado, because I know that they're gonna be getting added sugar elsewhere.
[00:10:51] And so that's just not something I'm gonna include in the rotation that day. And translate that from snacks instead of the granola bars of the fruit. Maybe think about a fruit and a cheese stick or a fruit and you know, a nut butter or a smoothie or something like that that can diversify some of the nutrients that you're offering your child in addition to the candy that they might also wanna be eating.
[00:11:12] So now when we look at how much candy to let them eat that day, if you have done your job, Of picking what food is offered using some of the guidelines and the advice that I just suggested. You know, offering a balance of protein, fat, and fiber from different food groups, and you have tried to space out and offer structure and routine to the day with when and where those foods are offered in my family and for, and my perspective is to let the kids eat candy on h.
[00:11:41] and keep a very loose script on it. I would suggest making sure that you know, they're not eating while they're up and about trick or treating or running around from a safety perspective. And I would maybe discourage my kids from eating something. If they just got home from school and they just had a class party and we're gonna have an afternoon snack, I would probably be trying to say, Hey, we're gonna.
[00:12:01] A smoothie instead, Let's keep your Halloween candy in your basket until tonight. So within the structure of the day, if they're just kind of snacking on it that night after we've already had our breakfast or lunch, our dinner, at that point, I encourage self-regulation for kids. Outside of some of those safety dynamics that you do wanna be considerative the day of how much you can let them have is, I would ask yourself, not so much how much is too much, but how much is enough?
[00:12:27] Because again, speaking to the age of children, if you have a really young child, say ages two or under, and you haven't introduced a lot of added sugar, what might be enough for them might just be a piece or. Yet. If you're worried that a piece or two is too much and you want no added sugar in your child, your tone and your whole approach is going to be different.
[00:12:45] And so again, tuning into your child's feeding temperaments and personalities and cravings and needs, I know with my kids, when I think about it in terms of how much candy is too much, well, I could say any. I mean, I don't really think they need any. However, from a social and emotional and cultural perspective of what it means to them, those needs do shift.
[00:13:10] And so if I can shift my thinking, not how much is too much, but instead how much is enough, I can trust that my child is going to self regulate that because the child of mine that I said doesn't care as much about Sweetss and. They're not gonna need as much enough for them. Might just be a couple pieces.
[00:13:27] However, my child who does have a much bigger sweet tooth, I know for them they're going to eat probably more than I'm comfortable with, and that's the reality of it. However, as parents, we wanna see that this is an opportunity to help empower our kids and understand that natural consequence of what happens when we overeat.
[00:13:46] Whether we overeat watermelon or we overeat cheese, or we overeat candy, it is good and important in these feeding roles and in being a respons. Feeding style in our families that our children realize that we decide what, when and where food is offered, but our child gets to decide if, whether and how much and when the, how much they choose to eat maybe, maybe makes us uncomfortable, but it teaches them the natural consequence of what either feels good and satisfies a craving that may or may not be related to.
[00:14:17] Oftentimes Halloween included. We eat for reasons outside of just true physiological hunger, but additionally, they understand what does their body feel like when they overeat something like candy, because that teaches them the natural consequence. Rather than us using that authoritarian approach where we might be inclined to excessively restrict here, we are equipping our child with those.
[00:14:43] Remember when I mentioned the authoritarian approach often is not giving the child that self-efficacy to understand how to self-regulate if and when the parent is not there doing so for them. However, when we use a responsive feeding approach, we get to use the opportunity to engage with our kids, to team up with them, to talk about how did that make you feel?
[00:15:02] And we're not enforcing those limits on them. We may be watching out for them and helping kind of remind them and paste them and have those conversations. But the intent. Is not control. The intent is to empower our kids to know how to self regulate with foods that are, can be very appealing, like candy.
[00:15:23] So that would be how I handle the day of. I'm gonna have a separate episode on kind of what I would do the night of in terms of separating out your pile and that whole process of choosing what to keep, choosing what to give away. Switch, switch, all of that kind of thing. So that's not what I'm gonna talk about in today's episode, but I do wanna talk about the days and weeks leading up to Halloween, the day of which we just covered.
[00:15:44] And then now as that mom asked in the days following, how do we taper that amount of sugar? Because of course, every day we're not just gonna have our child eat endless amounts of candy. And as you heard me mention for the day of, I don't think you should have an excessively permissive approach where breakfast, lunch, dinner, and snacks are candy the entire.
[00:16:02] So in the days following, this is really where you as the parent have need to, need to have already thought through. How you're going to approach this, because this is where they have this bit. Your children have this big bucket of candy and they wanna know when can they have it, How much can they have?
[00:16:18] They're gonna be pushing you to lock down what are those boundaries, What are the limits with love that you're allowing for them so that they know how to work and thrive within it. Just as I mention. Sleep training, getting your kid in a car seat. When our children know that we are calm and consistent and how we're going to approach some of these hot buck and things or things that can be rid really triggering as a parent child conflict.
[00:16:41] If we know how we want to approach these after Halloween, the days following are going to be almost a non-issue because you have to anticipate that your kid's excitement about the candy is going to be highest. The day following Halloween and their interest often will taper as well. And so we're gonna use that to our advantage and to use that to be more responsive feeders.
[00:17:03] Again, don't be so black and white with it that you're perpetuating conflict because you have these ideals in your mind that one piece of candy a day every day thereafter, because it may be that first day after h. Three. Again, not as what? Not how much candy is too much, but how much is enough in this little window?
[00:17:19] This is not, you know, consistent with the added sugar guidelines overall. This is in talking about specific weeks like Halloween, where candy is of increased interest and accessibility. So when we're looking at that, how much candy is enough to your child? If they're asking for 20 pieces, well that gives you a vantage point that what they think is enough.
[00:17:40] Is a lot. And so we want to team up with them and to begin thinking through in those days after, how do we begin tapering it down? Maybe that first day or two, or again, I kind of mention. Three to seven days before Halloween, how to approach things. Now, it would be the three to seven days following Halloween and that first day after Halloween.
[00:18:00] I would encourage you to let your children, especially at this mom's ages of kids that she has. Being three, six, and eight. See if and how much they're able to have control over their candy stash. I would still encourage to keep it in the kitchen. This is from a safety perspective. This is also just from a, you being able to shepherd them and how they manage their candy.
[00:18:20] But you can let them have their candy bucket and you don't need to tuck it on the top shelf of the pantry immediately and feel like you automatically have to jump into hyper controlling mode. Instead, what I want you to see is that is how you can begin to reinforce your roles in the feeding relationship by deciding.
[00:18:36] What, when and where candy is offered. So in those days following and in that taper approach again, how much is going to be a family decision? I think a piece or two. Again, that first day after Halloween, like November 1st, they may want a little bit more than that, or they may want it a couple more times per day.
[00:18:57] So you as the parent, knowing your children, knowing your family values, knowing your routine and your schedule, you can begin to think, are we going to. Allow them to have a piece of candy. First thing, when they wake up in the morning, are we going to let them, you know, take a piece of candy in their lunchbox?
[00:19:13] Are we gonna have it as a family at dinner and that's gonna be offered alongside the meal? Or is afternoon snack going to be kind of open access? To this candy offering, and I'll serve a smoothie or some milk or some yogurt or something to kind of stabilize out the amount of sugar that they're going to be having in that afternoon snack.
[00:19:30] So you wanna think about what you're gonna be offering compared with when and where. So is this something that you're offering at home? Is this something that you're offering or that you're sending to school? Is this something that's happening at the family dinner table or at the counter after school is a snack?
[00:19:46] What, when and where? Come up with what your planned approach. For this for the days following, because we do wanna taper down so that there are reasonable amounts of added sugar. And I'll link several resources that I've done previously on how much sugar should our kids have. And this is at baseline.
[00:20:03] This is not on Halloween day. This is, as I mentioned, the other 364 days of year. What is our goal in terms of how much sugar we want our kids to be having? Because we don't want our kids eating 20 pieces of. Every single day of the year. But for most families that would be pretty unlikely anyways, so we wanna be getting back down to a more realistic amount where our kids' interest level is not so peaked about it.
[00:20:28] But candy has again, just become kind of a normal part of life and. I'll share some more approaches on kind of how we go about that when we look at the keep versus giveaway pile in upcoming episodes. But to answer this mom's question in the days following, I would encourage you to take it day by day with the goal of three to five days after Halloween, starting to transition down to something that is more manageable on a day to day basis.
[00:20:54] So I share this in the episode that I air with my daughter, where I interview her, but again, I would allow access to this candy. In the day or few days following Halloween. So it's not, they don't make, they don't feel like you're controlling it and you're trying to force out of sight, out of mind. But once the excitement level and the energy and the interest in the candy starts to kind of wane a little bit, and you'll see this, if you tune into it without trying to control it, you will see this naturally happen for your child.
[00:21:22] And it's okay that it happens at different. For different children and different feeding temperaments. But that's when I would begin to start tucking it away. And you might, each kid might get their own ziplock in the pantry or however you choose to store it as a family. But that's where I would say it's not out front and center every day.
[00:21:40] So with Halloween being on a Monday this year, I would say by Friday we're gonna kind of put it up in the candy basket where we always keep the candy year round and just make that part of the transition into the weekend. Part of what we just do anyways when we're getting, you know, the house set for the next week.
[00:21:55] It's just a natural habit. It's not a behavior intending to control. Instead it's just showing them how it's gonna fit within our overall lifestyle. So to recap, in the days leading up to Halloween, I want you thinking about the amount of added sugar that is happening elsewhere in the diet. Begin identifying some ways that you might be able to reduce it in other places.
[00:22:18] Since they will be eating more added sugar in the form of candy in the coming week. Additionally, I want you to be thinking about how you can neutralize your own perspective and perception of Handy being different than a lot of the other sugar sweetened foods that our kids might have access to, and comparing some of the sugar content.
[00:22:35] So you in and of your own, Approach in feeding your child can begin to neutralize in terms of how much added sugar, a variety of foods that our kids eat and enjoy are the day of Halloween. I would encourage you to look at allowing your child to have as much as you feel they safely can do, so knowing that it is still your job as the parent to be maintaining structure and routine that day.
[00:22:57] As much as possible. So offer, offering satiating meals at breakfast, lunch, and dinner and snacks so that they have enough protein, fat, and fiber to fuel them for the day, and then allowing them to sprinkle in candy where it makes most sense for their day or your families. Holiday traditions or trick or treating or whatever you might be doing last, following up on Halloween, and then the days thereafter, thinking about how you can begin tapering.
[00:23:24] If we looked at really simple math and your kid had 10 pieces of candy on Halloween, you wanna be getting it back down to say, one or two pieces a day, and then it begins to phase out to where they have it just on occasion. And so you need to look at, can you go from 10 pieces on Halloween to two the next.
[00:23:42] Or does your child need a slower taper? But we are looking to taper it off while still allowing access and empowering self-regulation in our kids in the days following Halloween. And then a few days following Halloween, I would shoot for the Friday after. I believe that's probably like November 4th or so.
[00:24:00] That's when I would look to. Tuck away candy in the spot that you usually keep it year round. And that's when you can begin to utilize all these practices that we've talked about over the week before the day of and the week after Halloween, to be aware of where added sugar is happening in your diet.
[00:24:19] How you can help provide satiating options for your child with protein, fat, and cyber so that their blood sugar is balanced and that foods like candy can still be add. As a balanced part of their diet, but in the days following, this is just the habits and routines your family has and you have a really neutral approach to candy being offered as part of that.
[00:24:45] It has been a joy having you on podcast today, and if you've enjoyed it as well, I have a quick favor to ask. Do you mind hopping over to Apple Podcast and leaving me a written. This will only take you a hot second, but it truly blesses me every time I get to read one of you right over there, and it allows me to bless others through this podcast and the episodes to come.
[00:25:05] The other thing that you can do is to take a screenshot of this episode and tag me over on Instagram at Veggies and Virtue. I would love to see what action steps that you're taking from this episode, and also to support your family in the journey moving forward. Until next time, thanks for coming over to chat at My Kitchen.
[00:25:21] Remember that you'll always have a seat and a snack waiting for you here.
